Purveyor of Bollocks to the Crowned Heads of Europe
Tuesday, 17 March 2015
I put up a photo of a plaster cast of Michelangelo's David's mouth, and Chania put me in touch with a man in London who casts people arse-holes, because somehow it reminded her of him.
What I didn't say about any casts of anything is that they all - at sometime or other - have been in direct or indirect contact with the original, even if it many times removed. I always find this fascinating - a bit like the hands of movie-stars pressed into wet concrete in Chinatown, L.A.
The man who casts anuses also specialises in turning the positive outcomes into boxfuls of fancy chocolates. Yes, you can commission a box of chocolates in the form of your own fundament if you so wish, and give them as gifts to those who really love you. Just the personal touch this Easter.
Then I remembered how all casts and moulds have - at some time - been in direct contact with the original.
So you have to ask yourself, how much does the recipient of these chocolates love me?