Saturday, 12 October 2013

Another use of the word, 'twat'


Green Eyes came back home for her first visit to Bath since leaving for London a few weeks ago, and this is why I got twatted.

I had to meet someone earlier on (in the pub) and then I met up with all the others in a different bar, which only sells beer in bottles. It was a cold night, and I chose the strongest beer on the menu (5.8) so I didn't have to go back in all the time for more. Then I went back in all the time for more.

They all decided to come back to ours so I could cook them a meal and, when in the supermarket, I noticed a bottle of 15 year-old Glenlivet reduced to a mere £32, so I bought it. There were others at the same price, but I only bought the one. Self control. Like I said, the winter equivalent of 'sun over the yard-arm' had arrived in the form of a nasty East wind, which was my flimsy excuse for returning to the single malt.

Shortly thereafter, I got twatted.

Homework:  List as many uses of the word 'twat' as you can identify, and have it on my desk by midnight tonight.

18 comments:

  1. " twat the night before Christmas........"

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    Replies
    1. Artistic and creative, but not what you would call a 'meaning'.

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  2. I twatted the rat with a baseball bat.

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    Replies
    1. This isn't a poetry competition, you know.

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    2. Having said that, 10 out of 10 for identifying the word 'twat' as to 'hit'. You are top of the class right now, Em.

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    3. Why thank you Mr Stephenson.

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  3. My preference is the 21yr old Glenlivet but of course a twat would not know ass from elbow!

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    Replies
    1. It's my preference too, but I'm not Duidically rich.

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  4. Replies
    1. Twat you too, twat-face. (That isn't me saying that, please understand.)

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  5. Twat you very much. See, I can be polite.

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  6. Apparently there is a social messaging thingy called Twatter that connects twats with other twats... (sorry, I'm totally twatted tonight - it was a very good Merlot!)

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    Replies
    1. There is a 'Sit On My Face Book' too, apparently.

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