I can't remember why I made this drawing. I think the dog visited us one day and posed for me.
I went to bed the other day and thought of what could be a good show for a busker. Bath has a lot of buskers, but all they usually do is stand around screaming out over-amplified, middle-of-the-road music and generally making resident's lives a misery.
I knew one busker a while ago who also had his own Ian Dury tribute show. He had the right accent, was the right height and generally was a good match in that he had a loud gob on him. I never saw his act, but I did watch him perform in the street many times, and that act involved a unicycle and a lot of gob. More gob than unicycle. My idea would be great for him.
So here's the plan. I buy or acquire about 30 old mobile phones and rig them up to a circular frame, all pointing inwards. The frame surrounds a large glass cooking pan, and the pan is mounted on a cabinet. The cabinet has wheels so it can be transported away. The pan sits discreetly on a metal plate, and the metal plate is heated from beneath (when ready) by a hidden gas-ring and bottle.
The performer trundles the unit to a busy public area, then begins using his gob to attract tourists by bellowing out various things to do with conducting an experiment with the help of volunteers. This is where the gift of the gob comes in. I could never do it.
Once he has a large enough audience, he tells them to pull out their phones and ring a certain number. One by one the old phones on the frame begin to ring in various tones. There are some technical details which need to be sorted here, but that should not be a problem.
As the anticipation mounts, he surreptitiously turns on the gas flame beneath the pan and ostentatiously sprinkles yellow corn into it. The pan is already oiled. As the heat builds, the busker builds up the sense of expectation by bellowing out more stuff to the audience.
Shortly, the corn begins to pop loudly and the popped corn starts to hit the glass lid of the pan until it fills up completely. He then sells the hot popcorn to the crowd for £1 a tub.
I can see that there might be some issues to resolve when getting a licence because it involves food and gas bottles, but if people can sell hot chestnuts on the street I think that sets a precedent.
What do you reckon?
Thank you for making us try to be more cheerful today! But I don't think it will work satisfactorily.
ReplyDeletePlease share your concerns.
DeleteI'm exhausted!!! Yee Gods!! However, now you've got me laughing. P.S. Love your sketch of the pooch....looks just like my Lily except she's white.
ReplyDeleteOh, white. Other than that just like her.
Deleteyup....cutest upright ears and little face. identical except one is salt and the other pepper.
DeleteA great art installation. It reminds me of Haroon Mirza who I was at art school with; he used to do mad sound installations. You should set it up and enter it for the Turner Prize.
ReplyDeleteOr take it to Glastonbury.
DeleteIt looks very much like my George
ReplyDeleteIt’s quite lovely
Portrait commissions accepted.
DeleteI had to read it twice to understand it, but I think it is brilliant!
ReplyDeleteHave you seen the fake You Tube videos of mobiles cooking popcorn?
DeleteYes, I didn´t realise they were fake!
DeleteGive it a go. Let us know how it all turns out. A TikTok video would be good too.
ReplyDeleteI'll let you know.
DeleteYou could be a successful busker. Interested? I'll give you the details.
ReplyDeletePlease do.
DeleteAre you on something, Tom?
ReplyDeleteNo, I'm onto something.
Delete