Update

I thought I would let you know how the 'pineapple' is going.. That it's not going very speedily is pretty obvious. My fundamental laziness notwithstanding, the handling of it takes up a lot of time because it is very heavy and I am working on my own.

Because of its pointy nature, I had to begin carving it upside down whilst it still had a flat base to almost stabilise it, but then it is so top-heavy that I had to stick a pin welded to a metal plate up its arse to make sure it does not topple off the rickety trolley on its short journey from the rat-infested workshop to the fresh outdoors.

Once out, you must work as fast as possible to reduce the weight using four different types of chisel - a pitcher to knock large lumps off, a point to rip the stone away roughly, a claw to bring it closer to the finished surface and a plain, flat, wide one which you take right up to the pencil line.

I am sure that Fabergé did not have this problem with his eggs.