Thursday 25 July 2013

The Beach Boys


We're back at that lovely church at South Wraxall, Wiltshire, now. The tower is Norman, I think, and everything else goes downhill from the 17th century onwards, until the bloody Victorians tacked on the bit at the end.

I sat on an early 18th century table-top tomb this morning, drinking tea and smoking - as usual.

Then I wondered exactly how many tears had been shed over the deaths of the people around me, in the same way that I often wonder exactly how many peanuts there are on board any high-altitude airliner that happens to be passing overhead at about 30,000 feet, as one did as I was attempting to calculate generations of tear-fall.

"God only knows", was the answer. That's about as accurate as you can get under these circumstances.

14 comments:

  1. I hope you put out your pocket handkerchief to sit upon.

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    1. I didn't have to - I was wearing trousers at the time.

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  2. About the peanuts. Each international flight has a box of 200 packets of peanuts, each pack contains exactly 30 peanuts, therefore 6,000 peanuts (unless of course you don't count the ones that have already been consumed).

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    1. p.s. A pukka cut-stone roof is so beautiful. I imagine their cost prevented there being more.

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    2. I started working on the principle that a tear could only be described as such if it formed into a droplet by leaving the face and hitting the ground (or notepaper, or whatever). Maybe I should have used volume in centilitres as a measure? Fuck knows.

      Constructing a cut-stone, solid roof was a rarity, even in those days. Stone tiles on a wooden frame was much more common, which is why there are so few intact Norman-ish towers left. I wonder if that space has a floor, turning it into a room, and - if so - whether the only access is via that little, wooden trap, high up on the wall.

      If it is a room with only one door, then I would love to go inside it and see what has been left in it over the thousand or so years it has been in existence.

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    3. P.S. - Your peanut calculation reminds me of the warnings on the packets: 'May contain nuts'.

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  3. Due to many people having a peanut allergy, some airlines have switched to giving out salted pretzels - so much easier to count than peanuts.

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    1. But easier to choke on. WARNING - CHILDREN CAN CHOKE ON NUTS! They should be so lucky.

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  4. Wry wondering is a word that springs to mind.
    And smoking?????

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    1. Once again I am perplexed about the meaning of your comment, Weave, but maybe it's just me. The trouble is that when you are faced with three question marks in a row, you automatically think that an answer is required, and - for the life of me - I do not know what one to give. I need help.

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  5. I hope you had a calculator to hand. Bloody Victorians indeed; their influence has been ruinous in many a fine building. One of my favourite songs, bringing back memories of a tortured childhood....thanks.

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    1. The ironic thing is that - technically - the Victorians have never been surpassed in building skills. It's just what they did with them that is unfortunate.

      I tried to remove this you-tube clip after I had posted it up separately, but couldn't. Tortured childhood? Was that 'thanks' said through gritted teeth?

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