Purveyor of Bollocks to the Crowned Heads of Europe
Tuesday, 23 July 2013
Yet more German humour
Just time to tell you this story, before I go for another early night. I am now worrying that I have already told it... Anyway:
My German friend went to dinner with a rather well-to-do couple recently, and when he arrived in the house, he noticed that the husband was looking a bit sheepish. Eventually, they sat down at the table for the meal, and the story came out.
Early that morning, husband and wife had been relaxing in bed, and she was snuggling up to him with her arms wrapped lovingly around his neck.
Sensing an opportunity for a good joke at the same time as sensing that he was just about to let off a huge fart, he took a deep breath, tensed every muscle in his body and forced it out with as much back-pressure as possible, in order to make it as loud as possible.
Unfortunately (you've probably already guessed), he did not realise that he had developed a bit of a gastric problem overnight, and he completely and violently filled the small space between them with about a gallon of liquid manure, in the blink of a sleepy eye.
A little later during the dinner-party, my friend got up from the table to visit the lavatory, and the hostess said, "Oh, sit back down, Thomas. We don't bother with toilets in this house!"