Purveyor of Bollocks to the Crowned Heads of Europe
Sunday, 28 April 2013
By Appointment 2
When I was about 14, me and my mates would sometimes wonder if there could be anyone in the world who had never heard of The Beatles.
I think the general consensus was that there were probably a few thousand people who had not, and these were the ones who live deep in the Amazon jungle and throw spears at helicopters. Ironically, they all have classic Beatles hair-cuts, and have probably worn their hair like that for a few thousand years before the loveable lads from Liverpool.
Then there was the old argument as to who would survive the longest - The Beatles or the Rolling Stones. I backed the wrong team, and this was possibly the first of a long - almost consecutive - series of misjudgements which have lead to the situation that I now find myself in.
A couple of years ago, a well-connected friend of mine told me that he had recommended me to Mick Jagger for some specialist work at one of his houses, possibly the one in France.
"Mick likes a bargain," he said, "so be careful with the pricing."
Thankfully, I have not held my breath, as the phone has never rung. Maybe when he retires he will get round to it, but the man can afford much more energy than I can, so it might be too late.