Thursday 28 June 2012

And the winner is...


Arriving home last night was the brightest event in the whole of Spring for me, for a large cardboard box had arrived, containing my prize from Donna!

Actually, THREE prizes, because there was another T-shirt, PLUS a bar of her hand-made (and personalised) soap, made on her farm and sent all the way over from Chatsworth, USA - in the incredibly fast time of a few days.

Thank you SO much Donna,  I will do my best to boost the footfall in your fabulous farm from this side of the Atlantic from now on.  I'm sorry that the photo of me in the shirt is so bad, and that the wording is mirrored back-to-front, but - well - a heart's a heart, no matter which way round, and that's the important thing.

I try not to post pictures of myself up here too often - partly through a natural shyness and partly because I know that Grouchy disapproves, but mainly to avoid positive identification in cases of litigation.  This is why - although I regret the poor quality of the T-shirt reproduction - I am quite pleased with the shadowy quality of the rest of it.

Today will be mainly preoccupied with writing and research for me because, in part, of last night's lack of sleep due to the unspeakable North Midlanders who - on the council's instructions, presumably - are working from 6 in the evening until 6 in the morning, right outside my bedroom window, and will continue for 9 months unless I stop them.  I am not saying any more about that right now, mainly because I have posted a picture of myself up today.  I'll start swearing again tomorrow.

I also have to brush up on the techniques involved with the restoration of Scagliola, because - despite having told my client it will be a piece of cake to restore his large and beautiful, painted Georgian frieze-panels, I have never done it before in my life.


All through my long and illustrious career, I have blagged my way into jobs for which I have no qualifications, and I see no reason to stop now.  In any event, I have only ever had one complete disaster through blagging, when I told someone I knew how to weld lead.  Every other foray into unknown territory has been rather successful, even though I say it myself.  Right - Soap:


I will never look upon Saponification Sundays the same way, now that I am the proud recipient of this bar of Donna's which was an unexpected bonus to my prize-winning comment.  And look how she has labeled it!  Cro-Bar!  Jealous, Cro, or flattered?

29 comments:

  1. I have just discovered a down-side which I am sure Donna may not be aware of. I have just had a pop-up from 'VISTAPRINT' - the printers of Donna's T-shirts - who have somehow magically linked my computer with Donna's farm or website, and are now offering me big discounts on business cards on orders over a certain quantity.

    Is nowhere safe? The trouble is that many applications depend on pop-up technology, so if you disable pop-ups, many apps do not work...

    ReplyDelete
  2. I like when you post photos of yourself. m.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Donna, thank you for making Tom win. He deserves this good stuff.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I've been smelling of red wattle lard, pale ale, and coconut ever since.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I've been smelling of red wattle lard and pale ale for years.

      Delete
  5. when have you EVER stopped doing something because you actually worry about some disapproving?

    ReplyDelete
  6. Am dazzled by your hair, Tom. I think the her t-shirt is most becoming and the soap IS gorgeous... am wondering now what red wattle lard is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I'm guessing it is a by-product of the liposuction performed on certain farm-animals, Cathy.

      Delete
    2. I think Donna literally squeezes the fat out of them, shouting 'you dirty effing pigs, if you don't change your effing ways, I'll make you into effing soap!'.

      Delete
    3. I don't thinks so - she is very keen on ethical farming - or should that say, effical farming?

      Delete
  7. Congratulations, Tom! Looks like a mighty fine prize package!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Quite a change from English tweed and Armani suits but snazzy, nontheless! What perfect pub wear; it should strike up a couple of conversations.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. ... amongst the vegetarians... I saw a German tourist here in beautiful Bath yesterday, photographing the shop window full of meat in our local butcher! Talk about stereotyping.

      Delete
  9. Pictures or you are always a delightful way to start the day however blurry.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Too kind, Olive! I always start the day blurry, before 2 coffees.

      Delete
  10. How did you know that the tourist was German? Don't tell me that he was wearing shorts and sandals with 'orbital' socks pulled halfway up to his knees! Not that I'm stereotyping.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He was speaking in that language, Iris - otherwise I would not have jumped to conclusions. My only regret is that I did not have time to take a photo of him taking the photo of all that glorious fleisch. The style of his attire (and his choice of subject matter) made me think that he probably was born in the impoverished East, before the wall came down.

      I crossed the Eastern border in the North, a couple of days after the beginnings of unification, and was touched at all the children lining the roadside, offering cups of disgusting coffee to welcome the West. We had to drink it, but - by God - it was nasty. I've also never seen so many bananas for sale by the roadside before or since.

      Delete
  11. 'Natural shyness' Tom? I find that a bit hard to believe! Like the photograph though - would have been better if you had been smiling rather than putting on that sultry, smouldering look.

    Sorry about those North Midlanders - can't you get a reduction in your council tax or something? At lease the money saved would pay for a pair of ear plugs.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Don't knock the sultry, smouldering look, Weaver - it's got me more totty than you've had hot dinners... in the past...

      Delete
  12. I was in Berlin that December when the wall came down. People were sitting atop the wall that already sported big holes. The East German border guards were still around, but they did not do anything but look on. East Germans were able to leave their country, but at this point they still had to show their identification card at the border crossing. I almost started bawling when I observed an elderly man and his family getting ready for the crossing. Because this was such an emotional event for them, the father had gotten completely rattled and had, for just a moment, forgotten in which pocket of his coat he had put all of their identification cards. I simply cannot describe the look on his face and in his eyes when, just for a moment, he thought that freedom (now so near) would slip away.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I waved at security guards in towers when we crossed and - to the great surprised of my German friends - they waved back! Unseen. We were in a tiny, English Mini, and the border guard - who had never seen one before - said, "Smaller than a Trabant!"

      When we returned, they executed the Ceauscescus.

      Delete
  13. Tom, our T-shirt has never looked as handsome as it now does on you! Thanks so much for the kind words about soap and you should now as of yesterday we officially changed our name to "South Pork 'Effin Ranch"

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That will make Cro as happy as a pig in sh...

      Delete