I woke up this morning trying to think of an animal which name begins with 'U' - any suggestions?
Then I looked out of the window and saw more of the same - grey, wet and windy. I can only console myself with the knowledge that we here in Southern England are all in the same boat - or we will be if this weather keeps up.
That's the thing about rain, it falls on everyone indiscriminately - even the King. The only difference is that most people have to hold their own umbrellas. I was speaking to a colleague yesterday who has only just understood the value and function of the House of Lords, despite having reached the age of 60. I guess that his wishy-washy liberal aspirations have stopped him from admitting that there is an important function that a bunch of non-elected legislators serve, but he - like most of the chippy and resentful population represented by the Mother of all Parliaments - might have left it too late.
Nobody ever took me seriously when I said that I would rather be ruled by a benign monarchy than a bunch of 'democratically' elected, ambitious and avaricious war-mongers who are replaced every five years by more of the same, but worse.
Tony Blair created more 'New Labour' peers than any other Prime Minister during his reign of terror - I wonder why?
So my colleague - during his last moments of anxiety at confronting harsh reality - asked what should happen if the ruling monarch should suddenly lose his marbles and start ordering executions or whatever for anyone who disobeyed him, and I asked if he had ever seen the film, 'The Madness of King George'. If the worst came to the worst, I said, we would just kill the offending king if he refused to behave himself.
That sparked off a fresh anxiety, and he said "I don't want to be ruled by a bunch of murderers".
"Too late," I said, "You already are."
I don't know if anyone outside of G.B. has been following the bizarre case of the MI6 officer found dead, zipped up in a pad-locked hold-all and plonked in a bath-tub two years ago, but bizarre it is.
MI6 have been portraying the officer as a sado-masochistic fetishist and they were the first on the scene all that time ago, taking the opportunity to access all his data on various memory-sticks, lap-tops and paper files before Scotland Yard could get their sweaty hands on it.
During investigations, Scotland Yard hired a skilled escape artist to try to zip himself into a similar hold-all and padlock it shut from the inside. He gave up after 96 unsuccessful attempts.
For lack of evidence, the hearing were unable to give a verdict of 'unlawful death', but said that they were sure that the death was, indeed, unlawful.
MI6 is most definitely not a democratic organisation but they are answerable to an organisation that is - The Home Office and Parliament. What were the Civil Service called before Democracy? Courtiers.
Quiz: What is this object lying in the gutter outside a hotel?