Thursday, 27 July 2017

Cheese swap


I just called into the expensive cheese shop here in Bath and noticed that the Brie was being kept from running over the counter by two very shabby looking bits of discoloured marble.

As I was buying the bread (a wonderful white Sherston loaf for all you dedicated foodies out there) I suggested to the Frenchman serving me that I make them a proper pair of white marble cheese wedges, because the misshaped and dirty-looking bits of broken grey-veined marble did not go with the exclusive image of The Fine Cheese Company.

I was trying to work out what to charge them for the two bits, and they suggested they pay me in cheese. Perfect.

I went to take measurements of the diameter and height of the Brie and they said it would be easier if they just cut me a bit off to take home. Even more perfect.

This is the bit they gave me which I am just about to have for lunch. You can see why they need two bits of cooling marble either side of the cuts - a sort of Brie dam (not Edam...).

If only all transactions could be so simple and cooperative. Man goes into cheese shop and swaps some marble off-cuts for cheese. Everyone is happy.

This cheese shop has expanded hugely over the years. It stocks pretty much every type of European cheese, but also almost all the British ones as well. Britain now makes over 200 types of local traditional cheese - many more than even France.


28 comments:

  1. Such common sense and normality is rare these days. The cheese looks good and yummy. I have just had a ham sandwich.

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    1. I live on the edge of the best ham producing area of Britain - Wiltshire. 'Wiltshire' ham is now just a process in the same way we used to get 'Cheddar' cheese from New Zealand. Cheddar took on the same terroir rights as France has, but the ham lags behind.

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    2. Just thought - no wonder it lags behind. It's only got one leg.

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  2. That cheese shop sounds much like my fridge at the moment. I've never seen so much, and different types of, cheese in there as there are today!

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    1. I hope you take them out an hour or so before serving.

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  3. That looks divine ...... a good swap. XXXX

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    1. That's just a sample given for measurement. I will bring them the marble on Saturday and get a selection...

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  4. Would love to try the bread. It is hard to find good bread in the US. You have to make it yourself I guess. I don't know how to keep cheese at home and it gets moldy so I usually don't keep much around.

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    1. In my experience, the U.S. knows nothing about cheese. Monterey Jack is the best you will ever get outside NYC, I am afraid. Correct me if I am wrong, please.

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    2. And as far as bread goes, Scotland used to be a bread desert unless you wanted Mother's Pride, but things change.

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    3. All this talk of food has reminded me about the Brexit special deals with the USA. If we want to give Trump our goods, we will have to import their chlorine washed, battery-farmed, cheap chicken.

      Brexit stinks. It always has done and it will for the rest of my lifetime.

      WHY could we have not stayed in Europe and improved it from the inside?

      I'll tell you why - because we gave so-called 'ordinary' people a say in matters which they have no knowledge or experience of, and ignored the experts. That's the same thing as Trump did. to get his 48%.

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    4. The production of British hand made cheeses in the last 20 years have shown everyone - especially the French - that the agricultural lobby CAN be over-ruled by quality as opposed to mass production, and still make a healthy profit which goes to the real farmers, not just investors.

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    5. I have just read your Brexit views above. It's us proles buggering up democracy AGAIN !

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    6. Don't worry. Because of Brexit we will be forced to buy hormone injected meat, chlorine-washed chicken and Monterey Jack cheese from the USA in any Trump trade deal. There will be choice...

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  5. British cheese has got better and better I think as more and more farms and the like use it as a side line. One of my favourites is Stinking Bishop but I rarely find it in any whop- presumably they only make a small amount. Your Brie looks just right to eat with that bread you bought.

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  6. Sorry, I obviously meant shop not whop!

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    1. A whopping great shop! We can get Stinking Bishop around here quite readily, but the name puts me off. Likewise with the name of the beer - 'Bishop's Finger'. Combine the two and there is a vision of Hell on Earth right there.

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  7. I love Brie with apple slices. Yum!

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    1. Most cheeses go with apple. Brie is classically put with white grapes here.

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  8. That brie is just how I like it. The supermarkets around her mark the brie down as soon as it starts to go just slightly runny, believing it to be past its best I suppose. I buy as much as i can then.

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    1. Same with beef here. Fillet steak for half the price at twice the quality.

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  9. This weather an hour out of the fridge means Brie and Camembert are out of control and off the board before you can say (cheese)knife.

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    1. That's why they need good marble in a shop. Even an air-conditioned one.

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  10. You are wrong about American cheese. You just need to go to a good shop, not supermarkets.

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    1. I am very pleased to hear that and I have to admit that I have not been to the US for a few years. I hear that there are many small, artisan brewers making good beer there too.

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