Friday 23 December 2016

I don't care if you are boring - just drive


It is set to be the warmest Christmas (here) for 100 years. A storm is blowing up which is big enough to be named - Barbara - but will miss the East of the country. It may cause flooding, which means you may have to rescue me from the Somerset Levels. I was hoping to be snowed in, but watered-in will do, just so long as I get there before it rises.

The old house of my friend is right up against one of the largest drain gullies on the Levels, and is the sort of house that children draw when they imagine the perfect home - front door in the middle, back door in the middle and evenly placed windows above.

One year, someone forgot to open a massive sluice-gate downstream (or it got blocked) and the water rose about two feet above kitchen-floor level. With ancient flagstones throughout the ground floor of the whole house, all they had to do was open the back and front doors to allow the river to quietly pass through and down to the road outside, then sweep up the mud after it had gone.

During the massive flooding of a couple of years ago, their house was just high enough to escape the water, but 100 yards up the road it was knee-deep.

A few yards in the other direction, there is a large and famous pub called 'The Sheppey'. People come from miles around to visit this place - Wells, Glastonbury, Street, etc. - and it is very popular.

To get to it, you have to drive across the Levels with deep ditches both sides of the straight and narrow lanes - no mean feat when you are drunk! I am sure that they bring tee-total drivers with them on dark nights. In these times, tee-totallers become very popular. They are usually shunned by Christian society any other time.

26 comments:

  1. Don't mess with Barbara. After her father beheaded her he was struck by lightning on his way home. Be careful out there Tom.

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  2. I'll be the teetotaler, but I can't see well enough to drive at night anymore so don't know if I'd be much help. Happy holidays Tom.

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    1. WELL YOU'RE NO USE THEN!!!! Only joking - Happy Christmas to you too, Donna.

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  3. Wishing you a Barbara free and wonderful time ... is it just you and H.I going ? XXXX

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    1. Just had an email from Crockett and Jones ..... their sale has started !!! XXXX

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    2. No - we're ALL going! C and Jones sale started? Why could it not have started when I was 20, so I could get some life out of the shoes?

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  4. Blocked due lack of dredging by the Environment Agency.

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    1. Well, I do know the actual story, and the E.A. employ a local to deploy the gates as and when. Due to the lack of dredging, he made a unilateral decision to allow someone elses land to flood rather than his the time before last.

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  5. I fondly recall spending many happy times in the Sheppey Inn on summer evenings and on winter weekends and somewhere down there they used to hold notorious Badger Suppers too.
    O Happy drunken times supping cider.

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    1. ...and eating Badger. Up until the 1950s, a Bath pub used to give out roast Badger sandwiches once a year too.

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  6. Careful Tom, can't lose you and your witty ways. Seriously, I don't comment as much as I used to but been following you for years. Adore your blogging. Have a Happy and SAFE Christmas!!

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    1. I'm so glad you're still with me, but you need to do more of your own stuff. Happy Christmas to you too.

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  7. Dear Tom, wishing you, H.I. and your family a happy and peaceful Christmas.
    I love reading your blog. I enjoy even the "technical" posts where you describe complicated stuff but in an easy way for everyone to understand. Thank you Tom. A hug.
    Greetings Maria x

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  8. Tom, my your Christmas journey be a safe one. I have seen some photographs of Storm Barbara's clouds over Scotland and they are seriously dramatic.

    Now that I've sent that wish, let me add a wish to you and yours for a Happy Christmas. Also, many thanks for the pleasure of your blogging company all during the past year.

    On to 2017!

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  9. Well...I did mean may, not my.

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  10. Happy, happy, happy Christmas to you and all your loved ones! To a grand 2017 and much more of your non-boring ways!!

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  11. Hiya Tom, just popping in to wish you and Mrs Tom a very happy Christmas. Also to let you know how much I enjoy your blog, even if I've never had the guts/computer proficiency to say so before...

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    1. That's very nice. Thank you Rozzie. May 2017 bring fresh computer skills and more guts to you.

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  12. I always feel so sorry for people who suffer flooding, maybe that's why I've always bought non-flooding properties.

    Well, I'd better get on with enjoying myself, and suggest you do the same. Cro x

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    1. Yes, lots to do - including finishing the cake. The kids have had a falling-out which I am trying to repair before tonight so they can bear to be in the same room as each other. Wish me luck.

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  13. Merry Christmas, Tom. Stay clear of the rising water, eh?

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