Saturday 23 November 2013

Fanny by gaslight


Another crap photo - 3 different types of lighting in one small area outside The Museum Tavern in Bloomsbury, central London: gas, tungsten and LED.

The Museum Tavern is chiefly famous for one thing - Sherlock Holmes went there a few times when searching for a Christmas goose which had been stuffed with a large diamond. A monstrous carbuncle up the arse of an old friend.

Shortly after this picture was taken, my lovely companion - she who fell out of a tree and injured herself whilst dressed as a whoopee-cushion recently - spotted a fox trotting down the street, right next to the British Museum.

There are now more foxes per square mile in London than there are on the Duke of Beaufort's vast Badminton estate. This is probably because it is difficult for 50 people and horses to ride at full gallop through the city streets, and the foxes - wily as they are - know this, and have decamped in the opposite direction to all those retired bankers who have moved away from Bloomsbury and gone to live in Gloucestershire to be closer to Prince Charles.

When HRH the Queen Mother was alive, they all moved to Norfolk to be closer to her, but that generation has either died out, or become even more chronically interbred than they were already, and so indistinguishable from their neighbours.

This post is more to do with lighting than anything else, and the picture above is a rare example of the transition between the ghastly green pallor of a piece of incandescent silk ash and the shockingly bright blue glare of the only type of lighting which actually utilises the phenomena of the quantum leap to produce it. Many people do not understand that a quantum leap is a very tiny thing indeed, and I am one of them.

I knew right from the start that LED lighting was the way forward, but I have waited for about 15 years until they managed to iron-out the teething troubles of early production.

LEDs are now visually warmer, brighter, cheaper to buy and cheaper to run than they have ever been, and so I am now thinking of installing them all over our house - just at a time when energy prices mean the difference between 100 watts and 6 watts is a very dramatic saving indeed.

I have already bought two LED sign lights and two spots for the pub renovation, and they are bloody marvellous. Each unit has a running life span of 50,000 hours (they say) and since the bulbs cost pence to replace, the maintenance is about as minimal as it could possibly be.

Do you like the title of this post?


23 comments:

  1. I do like the title; it reminds me of a friend's restaurant of the same name in Chelsea back in the 60's. I was invited to the opening night (as a guest of, my friend, the owner), then before leaving I was presented with an ENORMOUS bill. I didn't return.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He lost a customer and a friend then. I bet the restaurant failed.

      Delete
  2. Yes Tom I do like the title of your post - it fits in well with my post on reading porn I think!
    We have solar power - it does seem to save us quite a bit on our electricity bills each year (about £1000 back) but as it cost a lot to have put in we shall be years getting our money back.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I searched with trepidation for your porn post Weave, but couldn't find it. Maybe my Safe Search is switched on.

      Delete
  3. Dear Tom,
    I agree with LED light having become much more 'good' to look at. A strange thing happened at Ikea, where I bought I tiny reading lamp and asked for replacement bulbs, they told me there aren't any - you have to throw away the whole lamp and buy a new one. It is not the cost - it is the attitude that annoys me (though I bought it nevertheless - thinking of the promised 50.000 hours).
    In your title there is one word I don't understand (grammatically), it is "by". The rest of the title I like.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. It is an old English play or music hall production, and Fanny was the star. 'By' means 'illuminated by', but otherwise it could be construed as looking at a woman's vagina in the light of an old gas-powered lamp.

      I hope that is clear enough.

      Delete
    2. To be absolutely clear, I meant vaginas in general, but not men's ones.

      Delete
    3. Surprise, surprise - more misunderstandings? I sometimes (yes, really) are writing as expert in Germany's edition of 'Men's Health' - but I never heard of a 'men's vagina' before.

      Delete
    4. Men's Health has a lot of tips to change that - gaining a sixpack instead.

      Delete
    5. What use are all those muscles if you don't use them anywhere other than the gym - unless it is to attract women?

      Delete
  4. The title of your post conjures up some very unsavoury images Tom !!!!
    … and, on a slightly different light subject ….. I can't stand those dazzling HID headlights that new cars have …. they can really blind you. Trouble is, I think that my car has them but, I can't see those !!!! XXXX

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HID? What are they? Am I behind with the latest technology?

      Delete
    2. High-intensity discharge lamps ….. the blue ones that blind you, although, I don't think that getting older helps ! XXXX

      Delete
    3. Oh, that's a shame. I thought you were talking about the fabled, 'dark lamps', i.e. 'hidden'.

      Delete
    4. P.S. - The days of my high-intensity discharges are now over, I think/hope (unless they come from the other end).

      Delete
    5. That made me larf !!!!! I shall now always think of that when I'm driving at night. It will make the bright headlights more bearable !! XXXX

      Delete
  5. Bet you've seen a few fannies by daylight in your time Thomas

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Only when I could be bothered to look. I usually went by feel, and I wasn't to fussy about that either.

      Delete
  6. Now all I have in my head...is all the images you have put in my head. Thanks again for that Tom.

    ReplyDelete