Monday, 2 September 2013

A girl's best friend


I now have something to work for - this is the last job I will complete before a short break in Seville, Spain. Can you guess what is is yet? (Anyone who knows where this catch-phrase comes from, will wonder if the 'indecent images' where made using a felt-tipped pen).

All I will say is that it is about £300 worth of Italian Statuary marble and I can just about pick it up and heave it in and out of the workshop while I am working on it.


I don't know what Michelangelo did without diamonds - actually I do. He employed a small army of fit young men and a team of thrifty boys who sharpened and resharpened ordinary iron chisels.

This object is called a 'Vanity' blade. It's not called that because - if you squint hard enough - you can see your own face in it. I think that it is so named because they were generally used for cutting holes out of slabs of marble to make vanity tables with sinks set in them, so that the crowned heads of Europe could carry out their toilet in the style to which they had become accustomed. If you now have an image of a king leaving his palace with a ceramic toilet bowl under his arm, then don't blame me. 'The Toilet of Venus' would be a good name for one, along with 'The Crapper' and 'The Krakatoa'.

You should have seen The Bride's face light up when I told her I had just bought several thousand diamonds - her favourite jewel (being somewhat obvious in her taste in rings and brooches. Not for her, the Muffin the Mule Girl Guide badge).

Within a couple of seconds, her face dropped and she said, "Oh. Some sort of stone-tool I suppose". Snigger snigger!

21 comments:

  1. It looks as if you are making a dial of some sorts, possibly a sun dial and better still if it was moon dial however, knowing you it might be a pint plinth too ?

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    1. That would be a big pint - it's 26 inches in diameter. It's not a pastry board either, or a sun/moon dial, but I have made them in the past - well, the sun ones, anyway.

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    2. Pity because there are very few moon dials about.

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    3. Commission me to make one, and I will. Do Druids have the funds for this?

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    5. A bit of a c**k up ! there sorry.

      Yes, we do have funds from time to time however as we party and feast a lot and Mead isn't cheap. We are currently broke, you may of course donate to us a Moon Dial & on receipt we promise not to curse you ever again.

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    6. You must save a bit on costumes though - hotels sell off old sheets quite cheaply after a few months of use. Plus you all save on razor-blades, so that must offset the mead outgoing.

      I would make you a moon-dial, but I never work nights.

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    7. Ah' unlike your UK druids we don't wear white bed sheets, our robes are very different and designed to keep us warm and dry.

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    8. That's the main reason I wear clothes as well - maybe I'm a Druid?

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  2. Mmmmh - I thought of a pastry board to present baked cakes first. Then a wild guess: a (garden) table top?

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    1. I see at the rimm two deeper grooves, both near. Maybe you but something like a bracket inside it - and that might carry a (bronze?) sculpture.

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    2. No, all those cuts are simply using the tool as a chisel. The object is very prosaic.

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  3. As it's Italian, I'll go for Pizza brick. Although discus did come to mind.

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    1. Go to the back of the line please, Cro,

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  4. Don't know is the short answer. More to the point you lucky so and so going to Seville - one of my favourite places in the world. Enjoy.

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    1. We've never been there before, Weave (never been there before).

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  5. Looks like a sun dial to me too. Better a felt tip pen than a sloppy paint brush.

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  6. Oh, and by the way, those cross marks are ALWAYS marked on anything cut both sides - it's a standard masonry technique, so don't let that put you off.

    In masonry, every mark is - once placed there - destined to be cut away.

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  7. It's a large marble hubcap, isn't it? Very nice too, perfect for a cultured lorry.

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