Tuesday 26 February 2013

Great, supine, protoplasmic, invertebrate jellies!


The words which make up the title of this post were an off the cuff insult directed towards London, Labour council members by Boris Johnson (the Mayor of London), when he was ejected from a meeting yesterday as a result of a majority vote.

I have inherited my father's tendency to stammer a bit, go red in the face, stare wildly whilst resisting the impulse to strike out and/or burst into tears, when confronted with an insult. In fact I have slightly improved on my father's technique by usually shouting a few four letter words of such an obscene nature, that total strangers who happen to overhear them (impossible not to) in a public place are deeply shocked and outraged. I did it only the other night in the pub, but I have to admit that alcohol played a part in it.

Boris was obviously beside himself with rage, but somehow managed to pepper his reaction with a variety of multi-syllabic words which most people only use if they are marine biologists, or biological scientists of some sort or other.

Boris went to Eton. I went to a Woking Secondary Modern.

12 comments:

  1. What is it, besides charm, of course, that makes you and Boris so irresistibly loveable?

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  2. I also suspect that you quite enjoy throwing verbal grenades into a situation...does Boris do that!

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  3. I'm not very articulate when upset or angry but my withering looks have been known to bring grown men to their knees (and make small children cry).

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    1. I usually have to employ physical force to bring grown men to their knees and make small children cry - I am impressed.

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  4. I like Boris, especially when he's being kind to the enemy. But at Windsor Grammar they used far more floral language to accompany The Wall Game.

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    1. They do in the boats on the Cam at Cambridge too - I have experienced it.

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  5. Broad's got it right - irresistibly loveable. All the charm of an unmade bed, but you can't help but warm to him.

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    1. Are you talking about Cro's face, or me and Boris?

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  6. Boris is a - now, what is a multi syllable word that means "prat"?

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    1. Like me, you also get stuck on the first four-letter insult that comes to mind. Interesting definition of the word, 'twat': A 'twat' is a hole in the hedge large enough for an animal to squeeze through. Make of that what you will.

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