Purveyor of Bollocks to the Crowned Heads of Europe
Sunday, 6 May 2012
1000 - a magic number
A big event is coming up, and I intend to have a massive celebration when it does. Can you guess what it is?
The London Olympics? Nah - to hell with the London bloody Olympics - I'll probably get threatened with a large fine for even saying the word 'Olympics' on a public blog. They have been threatening village flower-arrangers for daring to suggest they should join in with the fun by having the Olympic circles as a centre-piece of the municipal flower-beds.
They actually sent a letter to a village butcher recently telling him he must take down his window display of sausages which had been arranged in 5 interlocking circles, otherwise face a hefty fine from the people who control the merchandising side of the actual event. This story would be laughable if not for the fact that it is true. Actually it is still laughable, but the only people who are not laughing are the Olympic organisers.
I understand that - in order to be a world class athlete competing in this event - you have to eat, sleep and breathe athletics for at least four years in the run-up to the real thing, but why should we be expected to work ourselves into an Olympic frenzy at the same time? And why should we be expected to out-spend China in the attempt to organise the 'best Olypmic Games' ever?
Canada is still trying to pay off the debt incurred by hosting it, and how many years ago was that? When I was in Ontario almost 20 years ago, everyone was being charged modern-day British tax for a single packet of cigarettes because smokers - being the antithesis of the Olympic spirit - were seen as easy targets by a government which had squandered so many billions of dollars on an intrinsically elitist event, and was desperate to raise as much revenue as possible. So I just sent our taxi driver over the border to Detroit to bring back dozens of packets from a nation which did not - at that time - pretend to care about the health of it's citizens.
There is a massive housing crisis centred around the eastern side of the City of London right now, and homeless single mothers are being sent letters telling them that they must pull their children out of their local schools and up-roots to nearby Stoke-on-Trent (200 miles away) or face being put out onto the street with no roof over their head at all.
The Greenwich (and other housing departments) authority is playing politics with thousands of desperate families who are supposed to be in their care, by pretending that there is no available housing in the area and this situation has bizarrely come about in the immediate run-up to the London Olympics.
The real reason is - of course - that local private land-lords want their properties emptied in time to receive thousands of overseas visitors who will be coming to the area in order to watch the events - and these are the lucky ones who can both afford to buy the tickets and afford the £2000 per week for a holiday let for a small house about 5 miles away from the arena.
All the authorities sold off most of the 'council' (project) housing years ago (during Thatcher's reign of unhinged terror) to private landlords, so have no property left on their books in which to house all the families who have been paying tax since 1948 to maintain them.
The housing authorities' prime function now is to protect the interest of the private landlords, and to hell with single mothers or genuine asylum-seekers who have been forced to leave their own countries because of Britain's evangelistic foreign policy.
The Olympic committee's prime function is to protect the interests of it's 'sponsors' (investors) by doing all but close down small businesses all over Britain, who cannot - even now - afford to chip in a few quid toward the gravy-train which is the party of a life-time for countless building contractors, event managers, road-planners, hotel chains, airline executives, hedge-fund managers, T.V. executives and dozens of other hangers-on.
The sportsmen and women themselves are so single-minded (they have to be) that these minor details involving the petty inconvenience for a few million people go right over their little heads. Sports people have never been exactly renowned for their academic intelligence (aside from the creepy Sebastian 'Lord' Coe - now Sports Minister for Great Britain!) - all they care about is their 15 minutes of fame on the rostrum with a bit of tin dangling around their thick necks on a piece of red, white and blue ribbon.
So, as you have probably guessed, I am not a big fan of the Olympics, let alone of the idea of hosting it. But in all fairness, I have never been a sportsman in any case. I hate to spoil the party.
No, the big event I am talking about is much more important than that.
I only have 6 posts to go before I hit my 1000th blog entry! It's so exciting!