Saturday 4 February 2012

Steve Jobs - come back!

Sorry about this techno-post so soon after the eco-post of this morning, but I just had to tell someone... (sob)...

Anyone who bought an iMac any more than about 2 years ago would have also bought the roller-ball mouse that went with it, and would have spent many hours - days - trying to keep the bloody thing functioning by cleaning the stupidly small, grey plastic ball that stops working at the slightest hint of dust or grease. My hands are either dusty or greasy at any given time, so I eventually gave up cleaning the ball and have spent the last month or two just clicking on the blue bars to drag them down so I can see what is happening at the bottom of the page.

The day before yesterday, I walked into the Mac shop here and asked the young man if they had improved on the useless scroll-ball on the Mighty Mouse, and he replied that they had done away with it altogether, and showed me a ball-less mouse which responded to a gentle stroke of the finger.

"Perfect," I said, "How much is it?"

"£59."

gasp...

"We have some without boxes which are £49, if that helps."

I asked why they did not have boxes (fearing that they had been returned for being as useless as the others) and he told me that some people preferred the Magic TrackPad (TM) when they bought a package. I asked what that was, and he showed me the gizmo above. I tried one, and I liked it and the idea - it seems to do even more than the touch screens on iPhones.

"How much is it?"

"£59."

So I reluctantly bought one, having been assured that they were dead easy to install and connect - via BlueTooth (TM) - and the minimal instructions were inside the box.

Someone in the pub later asked me if I was going to instal it that night, and I replied that if I was going to smash it to pieces, I would rather smash it to pieces when sober, so I would link it up today, saturday, and that's what I have spent the last hour attempting to do.

When you turn on BlueTooth (TM), it is supposed to fire up an onscreen installation facility, and all you (are supposed to) do is follow the simple instructions. No such thing came up, so after about ten attempts at shutting down and re starting both machines, I gave up and went to a Mac software department for a free download which supports the thing, but it would not start up, so I resorted to calling up the shop and asking for advice.

The bloke took me through all the procedures that I had spent the last hour doing myself before asking what operating system I was on. 'OS X .4' I told him, and he said that this system was too old (about 3 years) to support the Magic TrackPad (TM) and that I would have to instal 'Snow Leopard OS 10 .6' (TM) in order to stand any chance of using the Magic Track-Pad (TM), and it costs £26.

I groaned, and said I would come in and buy the disc, but he said I couldn't - I would have to buy it online from the Mac Shop after which they would post it to me. So I did.

I ended up talking to a Mac man on the phone, because I was worried that I was paying this £26 about 3 times, there were so many pages coming up saying 'Buy Now' which I kept clicking on.

He said I wasn't really licensed to buy Snow Leopard (TM) as I should start off by buying a Mac box kit of OS 10.5 (now obsolete) costing £87 before I upgraded to Snow Leopard OS 10.6 (TM). I asked 'why?!' and he said that someone has to pay for all the research and development which results in all the wonderful products that Apple (TM) sells to us for vast amounts of money, and I responded that I had - in the last month alone - already paid about twice as much on accessories for my Mac as most people spend on a good PC laptop, but since they no longer stocked the obsolete OS X system, he had to send me Snow Leopard (TM) anyway.

He asked me why I wanted to upgrade my operating system anyway, I said SO THAT IT CAN SUPPORT THE £60 MAGIC TRACKPAD (TM) THAT I HAVE JUST BOUGHT FROM BLOODY APPLE (TM), BECAUSE THE STUPID ROLLER BALL ON THE MOUSE KEEPS GETTING TOO DIRTY TO USE AND I AM FED UP WITH TRYING TO CLEAN IT ALL THE TIME!

He calmly said that he has been using one of those mice for years and has never cleaned it once. I said that MAYBE HE HAS GOT CLEANER HANDS THAN ME, BUT WHATEVER - I NOW NEED TO GET THE FUCKING MAGIC TRACKPAD (TM) WORKING, so he sold me a disc with Snow Leopard (TM) on it.

So I paid the £26 and I will let you know how I get on after it arrives. Should be a laugh.

12 comments:

  1. For some unknown reason, Tom, this post bothered me. My pet hate is when you pay good money out for something that doesn't work. The first question the sales assistant should have asked - is what operating system you're using and to check if what you're intending to buy is compatible. I think you were mis-sold this and you should be entitled to your money back. Anyway hope you're able to sort it.

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    1. I had thought about marching back to the shop and getting my 60 quid back, but then what? Carry on with sticky balls and struggle through the rest of my life? I have bitten the bullet, but I will bite the apple if this next ploy does not work, Moll.

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  2. You do know that they released Lion OS.whatever recently, yes? Sadly, Apple failed to mention up front that it doesn't support Word 2004. So now I have to get a writing program that will rescue my lost(?) documents or upgrade to some newer version of Word. Sigh.

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    1. I was forced to download versions of Word and all the associated programs when I bought this Mac, gmb, and I hate using them, but I have to.

      It is always recommended that you back up any data before installing a new O.S., but how many people do? I have very large gigaballs on this machine, so why the fuck would I want to pay for a seperate hard-drive?

      If you have a lot of lost stuff, then find a geek who can dig it out for you - if the police can do it, then so can a geek.

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    2. Thanks. I think if I get Pages (a mac writing program). I read that it can "recover" my lost documents. I'll go to the local alternative Mac place to have them talk over me and sell me something I don't need.

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    3. The chances are that anything you wrote in 'Pages' will not need to be recovered anyway - everything I write in it is a load of shite, and I never needed to write it anyway. This also covers anything written in 'Word' as well, in my experience. There are some documents that I would love to lose, but have never had the opportunity to.

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  3. Thank god I have just a simple Acer laptop, and an accompanying wireless mouse. Everything works just fine and dandy. Lady M uses an I pad (sp?); no mouse.

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    1. And to think that I thought that buying this Magic TrackPad (TM) would make my machine even simpler... I have yet to install Snow Leopard (TM) without wiping my hard drive yet. I may be out of touch for some time in the future...

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  4. I use graphic tablets (wacom) and I've never looked back.

    My office looks like a Mac museum - all sorts of (aged I suppose now) macpro's tucked under desks, rotting in dark cupboards, all manner of Apple gizmos and experiments.

    We are all thier gullible guinea pigs!

    I long ago decided not to buy into the consumer greengrocer's market that is Apple.

    Before I made this decision though, I must have spent enough to buy a nice new car on this stuff.

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    1. I know what you mean, Chris, but I am too far down the Apple road now to turn back, and - besides - when they work, they work so well and are so simple. Also, they are just so pretty....

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    2. $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$!!!!

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