Sunday, 30 October 2011

Bloody Mermaids


Once I was staying in a small coastal cottage on a headland at Cornwall, and - on an otherwise calm and peaceful night - I was awoken by the screams of excited girls, as if standing next to a Ferris Wheel at a fairground.

The screams became louder as the beam of the nearby lighthouse swept past and through the window of my little room, casting a fleeting light on the ceiling which - after three nights at the cottage, I was well used to - then receded into the distance with the light. I got up and went to the window to investigate.

Out to sea, Mermaids were leaping from the water like dolphins, catching the sweeping beam of light, clinging on with slippery, wet hands and being flashed past the cottage and over the jagged rocks of the cliffs before letting go with whoops of delight and falling the 200 feet back into the water to swim around and catch the beam again.

It was late, and I now regret shouting out of the window to tell them to shut up and let me sleep. In the morning, of course, they were gone and they did not return the following night.

19 comments:

  1. Sometimes, Tom, I think you are high maintenance, and then other times, such as now, I think you are justifiably so. A fine, fine post about the bloody mermaids.

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  2. Your household seems to be a high maintenance one, Mise - fancy pancakes? What's wrong with a bit of lemon juice? (lol, etc.) X

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  3. Does Rick Stein serve 'Mermaid and Chips', or would that be seen as cannibalism?

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  4. Mermaids. A fisherman's wet dream.

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  5. It's always that time of year for me, J.

    Yes he does, Cro. Like Monkfish, he discards the heads (the most unapetising bit to us humans) and serves up the tails as cod. You should see his waste bins.

    Have you ever caught one, Chris? If they're anything like the ones in Harry Potter, I think I'd cut and run.

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  6. recreational drugs are evil

    turn to the ways of the lord Thomas!

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  7. You can't beat 'Mermaid in a basket' up the pub on a saturday night.

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  8. Judging from John's last video, he would go for the battered mermaid.

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  9. or mermaid fingers...Bird's eye of course.

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  10. there is nothing worse than mermaid smelling fingers

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  11. Never tried it - which end do you stuff?

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  12. I don;t believe a word of it Tom, but I must admit you tell a good yarn.

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  13. It is my intention to tell more lies, Weaver - they go down so much better than the truth.

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  14. My 14 year old son loved this story

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  15. What did you have to drink before going to bed??? Just sayin'....

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