Thursday 9 June 2011

Sweet Dreams

There is a sweet shop in Westgate Street, Bath, which only appears to children who believe in it, and today, I found it almost accidentally when tapping on a few bricks in the wall as I was waiting for my prescription to be mixed in the nearby Superdrug.


I walked in and was confronted with a bewildering array of confectionary, when a white haired old man - alerted by the tinkling of the bell as I opened the door - stood in front of me, then placed a pair of gold-rimmed, half-moon spectacles on his nose.

"Bless my soul," he exclaimed, "it's Thomas Stephenson!"

I had never been aware of meeting the old gentleman before, but he continued, "Why, it seems like only yesterday since I was supplying your dear father with his first bag of sweets!"

He asked me what what I fancied, but - seeing my confusion - suggested some fizzy and acidic lemon bon-bons which he drew down from the shelf in a large glass jar, having reached up with a set of dark oak step-ladders.

I put one in my mouth, and soon there was a rushing sensation in my nether regions and I let out a loud fart.

"Dear oh dear, that will not do. Now... let me see... how about these..." He reached up and selected another jar which seemed to contain a multitude of small and brown writhing frogs, then invited me to place my hand in it and select one. This I did, but - no sooner had I brought it out than it leapt from my palm and out of the half open door, sticking to the side of a passing bus. I never saw it again.

"Most unfortunate", said the old man, then pondered again.

"The sweets always choose the boy - never the other way around. Now, I wonder..."

He again climbed the ladder and brought down a vast jar of Basset's 'Milk Bottles' (no artificial colours or sweeteners), decanting a quarter of a pound into a brown paper bag. As I put the first one in my mouth, he looked on in smiling approval, but when I turned around to give him the thruppence for them, he had gone, and so had the shop.

I wonder if I will ever find it again?



20 comments:

  1. all of us over 45 remember sweet shops like this.....

    big jars, paper bags......scales....

    the youth of today.... what do they miss eh?

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  2. Nothing beats the old fashioned English Sweets. I love those milky bottles.

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  3. Fireballs! Two for a penny. I miss 16 cents a gallon gas.

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  4. Chocolate freckles, milk bottles and chico babies were my favourites at the corner store. x

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  5. Black Jacks (4 for 1d), Licorice wheels, Flying saucers, Lemon crystals (that you dipped your licked finger into). But my favourite to this day (I'm an addict) are Bassett's WINE GUMS.

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  6. Hello Tom:
    This is the stuff of which dreams [today] are made! Yes, we remember such shops. Long gone along with their ghastly replacement of Woolworth's 'Pix 'n Mix'.

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  7. If I could afford to start a business it would be an old fashioned sweet shop like this.
    I remember the thrill of buying 2 ounces of sweets which were scooped into a white, triangular paper bag.

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  8. Coconut mushrooms, cocnut ice - in fact coconut anything for me please if you find that shop again. The only thing is - I can't help wondering what you had been taking - drug - drink - anything really - or did you wake up with your head on the pillow.

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  9. Weaver,
    It would have been worse if he woke up and the pillow wasn't there...giant marshmallow :)

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  10. I haven't thought of that joke since I was a kid, Eileen! These days I am more likely to dream I am eating a giant Curly-Wurley, then wake up next to a rutting boar. (actually, that sounds more of an animal-hoarder dream).

    That shop is really there all the time, and it is a brilliant idea - it really is like a Victorian sweet shop. I only go in there for milk bottles.

    Here's a little known fact about my early life: Up to the age of 4, I was brought up virtually living over a sweet shop, because my father had one called 'The Candy Shop' in Hindhead, Surrey. Those were the days when I thought my teeth would last forever....

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  11. I have a similar quaint old shoppe on my local high street that also causes hallucinations...

    ...it's called Bargain Booze.

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  12. The company 'Screwfix' ( a supplier of tools to the trade, so stop sniggering) proudly says in their brochure that they supplied the wood-lathe that was used to turn all the wands for the Harry Potter films. I wonder if they have a machine that automatically scrapes the bottom of barrels?

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  13. Ah - I thought your post was going to end with 'and then I woke up'... I'm glad for you (and I expect your dentist is too) that it's actually there. Abby

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  14. http://www.freepatentsonline.com/4957222.html

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  15. I wouldn't have been glad to wake up if it was the curly wurly dream, Abby. (Or a dream involving sucking a giant licorice-stick...)

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  16. Another animal-hoarder dream?

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  17. We had sweet shops in my neighborhood in the Bronx also. If you were lucky enough to have a nickle, you always shared. Most candy was 2 for a penny. I remember the milk bottles, possibly not the same as what you had, chocolate babies (my favorite), licorice, and pepermint balls that melted in your mouth very quickly. There were so many choices that Mrs. Ress would give us 5 minutes to press our faces against the glass cabinet to ponder which ones we would choose that day. She never rushed us, people were kinder then and big decisions are always hard to make.

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  18. Oh, how I long to see a real sweet shop. Just don't have them here - nor experienced one as a child.

    Farmer

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  19. So you were brought up in 'Noo Yoik', Starting? I had never heard of Chocolate Babies. Must have been a sensitive post-war thing over here after all the U.S. G.I.'s left.

    Poor Farmer. No wonder you are an animal-hoarder, like John.

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