Saturday 19 August 2017

RIP The Duke of Beaufort


The 11th Duke of Beaufort died the other day. This is the tomb of the 10th and the (25 year-old) photo was sent to me by the sculptor yesterday. You will not find any others on the net, for reasons which will become clear a little later.

A few weeks ago, I tried to show this tomb to my German guests, because I built it under interesting circumstances. I began working for the sculptor just as he was completing the 10th Duke's tomb, so I did not have much of a hand in its making, but I did build it in Badminton House churchyard.

The 10th Duke was the quintessential huntin', shootin' and fishin' aristocrat, but he was best known for his passion for hunting foxes on horseback with hounds. The Beaufort Hunt is still the most famous in England.

As the figurehead for the sport of riding to hounds, he received a lot of unwanted attention from hunt saboteurs and other antis. The antis felt so strongly about their cause that they dug up the body of the 10th Duke after he died and before I put up Simon's memorial. Fortunately, they left the body on site and but daubed 'ROT IN HELL, BEAUFORT' on the church wall.

They re-interred the Duke, but this time cast a six inch by six foot by six foot slab of concrete over the grave to prevent further digging. This made the erection of the tomb a straightforward matter as it provided ready-made footings for the Portland stone. I reinforced the box section of the tomb with concrete blocks, just in case someone tried to kick it to bits.

I arrived in the churchyard one day to survey the grave and assess what would be needed for the tomb building, and as I stood on the concrete slab, a car rushed up and two men got out and ran toward me, obviously expecting me to run away.

They asked what I was doing there and I explained. They calmed down after this and I asked how they knew I was there - these were the days before the ubiquitous cameras.

They pointed to an arial scanner on the roof of the church, and said that I had set it off when I walked up. They said that they were a bit twitchy, because the alarm had been set off every night at the same time for weeks, and when they rushed to the churchyard, nobody was to be seen. They had searched the grounds for vandals and hunt-sabs, but there was nobody. 

So one night, they lay in wait, hiding in some bushes with torches at the ready. Sure enough, at exactly the same time as the previous nights, the alarm was triggered.

The shone their torches at the grave and saw a lone fox, casually strolling over the last resting place of the 10th Duke of Beaufort with a disdainful air of unconcern.




18 comments:

  1. The death is great timing for Bunter's divorce, or not as the case may be.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. The Duke's eldest son and heir Harry, Marquess of Worcester, always known as Bunter, currently in the throes of divorcing his wife, Tracy Ward. They are a fun loving family.

      Delete
    2. With a name like Somerset you could hardly be anything else.

      Delete
  2. Well, the tomb is made out of a beautiful stone. And if google map does not lie, Badminton is a beautiful place.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Badminton is indeed a beautiful place. It is surrounded by many other beautiful places, but I believe Badminton is still owned by the Somersets. There are various heraldic badges set into the walls of the most humble abodes in what you could think of as the 'High Street'. They 'whitewash' the walls in a very tasteful salmon pink or yellow ochre. They were well ahead of Jocasta Innes in the paint-finishes world.

      Delete
    2. Ohhhhh, lifestyle blogging! Now I will have an even closer look at Badminton. They own the whole village? Hotdiggety!

      Delete
    3. Yes, it gets a bit feudal when horses are involved.

      Delete
  3. When I was erecting the tomb, an elderly and somewhat confused lady appeared and asked if I had seen her husband, who she had not seen for a while. This turned out to be the Duchess, who was - sadly - unaware that I was standing on his grave. She was escorted back to the house by a nurse.

    The next Duke was a tall, dashing and handsome lady-killer who used to work in the London gallery business.

    ReplyDelete
  4. I believe they are a great fox hunting family.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. That could be considered an understatement, Weave.

      Delete
  5. I'll bet that fox would have raised both middle fingers in a salute, if he had had fingers.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think just pissing on the grave would have been enough.

      Delete
    2. And shouting 'Tally Ho' as he did so.

      Delete
  6. Beautiful work sir. You did as promised.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I did not make it, but I was almost killed during its construction. That's another story.

      Delete