Thursday 20 April 2017

Off the wall


I am now gunless so I removed the cabinet from the cupboard to make room for the clothes which were evicted like excess passengers from an over-booked United Airlines flight.

A friend asked me if I felt less of a man for not owning any guns, and I said that I thought I had noticed my willy had shrunk since I got rid of them. If only manhood was that simple.

22 comments:

  1. Goodness I hope he said it with tongue in cheek, so to speak! Isn't it manly enough that you bang rocks together all day?

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  2. I think not having a gun makes you more of a man .... the shrinking willy is probably just old age !!
    I love your floorboards. XXXX

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  3. As some countries reduce their home stocks of arms, others increase them. I wonder if the UK's sale of pitchforks has increased?

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  4. So I missed a lot - you had a gun?!?
    I have an old posh Lady pistol from the Le Page (around 1840) - even if it would work (some people think is good that it doesn't) it would take some time to load it. (Retractable hammer)

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    1. I had 3. When I was a kid, I had a classic .22 Derringer. Amazing what we used to get away with.

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  5. And what did you do with your gun ... and why did you stop doing it?

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    1. I shot clays and I stopped because I had had enough.

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    2. I reckon I either shot or missed about 15,000 clays.

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  6. All the old chaps at the allotment who used to own guns and shoot the local wildlife have either died or had their licences rescinded. (The rabbits used to end up at the butchers.) Just as well as the beautiful old orchard behind the plots has been grubbed out and is now paddocks and a sand school. I loathe horsiculture too.

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  7. Don't worry about the willy. Men with really big cars are supposedly compensating for very small willys. I suggest that you reverse this and get yourself a really small car - automatic enlargement of willy should be imminent.

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    1. I tried that and it didn't work, not that I care.

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  8. Neither willies nor guns have a lot to do with manhood in my book - I go for a man who can change a fuse, put up shelves, dig the garden, defend me from a fierce dog.....the list is endless.

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    1. I can change a fuse. I did it the other day. I am scared of large dogs though, especially without a gun.

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  9. Why is it men are so obsessed with their willies? I don't understand it.
    Briony
    x

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    1. I know you don't. I am not that obsessed actually, but I do like a joke every now and then, and I am not so obsessed that I don't mind making fun of myself and my kind.

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  10. Im obsessed with other mens willies

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  11. Thank you....best laugh of the month so far!!!

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