Friday 24 June 2016

I have a dream...

I now have a purpose, intimated to me by God in a dream this afternoon.

Wessex extends from Winchester to the borders of Kerno, and I and my kin shall rule it forever more.

There are no obstacles in my way now that the intermediary Icinii tribes have been routed by the Roman legions, and it should not take more than about 50 years to rebuild the wall that Hadrian built against the Northern savages, who will - in turn - be granted a recount by the Gallic war-councils who we have already made peace with.

Now get this straight, ye unbelievers - THERE IS NO SUCH THING AS A 'GREAT BRITAIN', NOT EVEN A 'GREAT' AMERICA, NO MATTER WHAT THAT ARSEHOLE TRUMP SAYS!

'GREAT', AS IN 'GREAT BRITAIN', REFERS TO A LITTLE GROUP OF ISLANDS 30 MILES TO THE NORTH OF GAUL! IT SHOULD BE, MORE CORRECTLY, REFERRED TO AS 'GREATER BRITAIN'! THERE IS NOTHING INTRINSICALLY 'GREAT' ABOUT OUR LITTLE SHIT-HOLE OF AN ISLAND, NOW THAT WE ARE NO LONGER A MILITARY AND NAVAL  EMPIRE!

QUEEN FUCKING VICTORIA HAS BEEN DEAD FOR SOME TIME NOW, AND THE HUNDRED-YEARS WAR AGAINST THE FRENCH HAS BEEN OVER FOR EVEN LONGER.

Sorry to shout.


21 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. No, you're thinking of Arthur, not Alfred - DERR.

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  2. Hoping that you will be a benevolent ruler. I find shouting acceptable when strategically used.

    Keeping in touch with the news from your kingdom diverts me from our current choice of Donald v. Hillary.

    I saw an interview with Alan Greenspan today that really drove me to shouting.

    Did you get to see the Strawberry Moon. Just to switch the subject. A bit.

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    1. I haven't even heard of the Strawberry Moon - is it like a Harvest one?

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    2. I think the idea for the name is that it falls on the solstice and signals strawberry picking season has begun. However, the coinciding with the solstice is rare (last time in glorious 1967) and over here this year strawberry season is just about over...we've moved on to delicious blueberries.

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    3. Frances, what did Alan Greenspan say?

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    4. "This is the worst period I recall since I've been in public service. There's nothing like it."

      And more. You can find more by google search of Alan Greenspan on CNBC.

      Please forgive me, Tom, for hijacking your comment space.

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    5. You carry on. I seldom monitor things over 2 days old in any case.

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  3. Wow ... just wow.
    From Australia x

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  4. You need to shout Tom - otherwise people just will not hear - most of them have just gone deaf.

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    Replies
    1. I very rarely talk about deafness in the pub these days, because every time it is mentioned, some wag will always say, "Eh?", and I want to hit them.

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  5. In the words of Michael Winner 'Calm down Dear!'

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    1. Michael Winner once left an extremely unkind comment in H.I.'s exhibition visitors book, so I had to have him killed. It took about 20 years, but it was worth the wait.

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  6. Replies
    1. That's the intro to Mad Dogs and Englishmen...

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  7. Wow... you need to chill, guy... really...

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    Replies
    1. Well it brought you out of the cupboard, so it wasn't a complete waste of time. Oh wait - I've just re-read your comment. Maybe it was.

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  8. Your trite insult is more proof that you're a caustic, old man. Quite frankly, that can be far more distressing to be around than a spoilt child. I didn't vote to LEAVE, but a vote is a vote. What a ridiculous rant. It's the strong reactions of the likes of you that actually now has me wishing I had added my vote to LEAVE! Since the vote, not a single thing in my day-to-day life has changed.

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    Replies
    1. I see I have found someone else without a sense of humour.

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    2. Nothing has changed in your day to day life in the three days since the vote? You sound a little impatient for change.

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