Purveyor of Bollocks to the Crowned Heads of Europe
Friday, 4 April 2014
Putting on a brave face
I watched 'The Exorcist' last night for the first time - better late than never.
Apparently I am 41 years too late, so I won't bother with a John Gray type critique, other than the only real fault I could find with the film was that the girl's make-up was a bit overdone, and her projectile vomit was a Kermit-green colour which actually made me laugh out loud. I think I was supposed to be shocked.
H.I.'s contribution is that she thinks Max von Sydow has 'a nice shaped head'. I know what she means, but every time I see him, I always think of those depressing Ingmar Bergman films where he speaks Swedish and kills small boys with his bare hands.
I spend years telling people that I thought 'Ingrid' Bergman films were depressing, and it was a long time before I understood why they looked at me quizzically when I did, but - funnily enough - the older I get, the more depressing I find Ingrid Bergman films as well.
The big problem is that I never fancied Ingrid Bergman. I could almost forgive Audrey Hepburn her slappable 'little girl' face (unlike Audrey Tautou), because it was quite pretty, but then again, I never saw her without make-up.
Talking of seeing people without make-up, WHAT is the big deal about all these girls and starlets bravely sending out selfies wearing no make-up? I go out every day without make-up (except Saturday nights), and I don't expect to be applauded for presenting myself the way that God (and 45 years of alcohol abuse) has created me.
The combination of selfishness, stupidity and laziness has resulted in thousands of teenagers giving money to charities that don't need it, because they used predictive text when typing ONE WORD before sending it to a five-figure number, then finding that they had adopted a polar bear that they never even heard of.
Now if Linda Blair had sent a selfie with all that make-up on, that would have been brave.